Raine...you asked me, at my last post, if I felt bad about being stable and if I prefer it to crisis. I guess, for me, that's comparing apples and oranges. Stable is good, but I find it so dreary. So blah. And that is when I yearn for my mania...for the fun part of it. I don't think about the destructive behavior that surrounds it. I just think about how much more energetic and alive I feel. The depression? That's another matter entirely. The depressions make me feel weak, vulnerable and not worthy of my existance.

So, while stable is nice...I still have fond memories of manic episodes.

Double edged sword I guess.

Thanks for asking.