I spent four blissful days in vegas where even my mother didnt get to me. i felt safe, loved, happy and content. i came home to exactly the opposite feelings. not home so much as my job. the anxiety level was unbelievable. i never knew i could hate something so much, but i do. i am seeing things again...things that aren't there. started just before going to vegas. i see people. (insert sixth sense joke here). not dead people. just people that aren't there. im hallucinating again. making matters worse...my psychiatrist has just left his practice to work at the veterans hospital. he was the only person that i entrusted my care to...and he's gone. not even a referral to a new doctor. just 3 months worth of telephone psychiatry until i find a new doctor.
its like your hand falling asleep during masturbation...the ultimate rejection.
5 comments:
It must be a bad time of year. My son has also recently started seeing and hearing things again....I will be thinking of you:-)
CP, could the job be what has triggered this upswing of your illness? Maybe its time to quit. I know that's easier said than done. Take care
When I came back to my job after three weeks in Poland, the whole place looked so insane I couldn't believe I ever worked there. I wanted to quit then and there, but slowly after being on the job again, I started to notice all the reasons why I had stuck it out there. Hang in.
I truly believe Vegas is a magical place.
Sorry about the people you are seeing - it sounds really scary.
Well, I am sorry you are going through so much right now. Knowing you are not well and not being able to control it must be very frightening and dangerous feeling. I am so sorry.
I am going to Vegas with my psycho Boss Lady on the 22nd. I am so nervous to fly. I hope it really is magical there like Googie say's it is....
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